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  • Leslie Tourish

Change Your Life in Nine Steps

Updated: Mar 4, 2021

1. Be fully present in the moment. It’s estimated that up to 80% of our thoughts are about the past or the future rather than the present. What a tremendous dilution of energy! Being fully in the present means you have no thoughts about past or future. You’re fully engaged in where you are, what you’re doing, and what's taking place at this exact moment.

2. Meditate. I know you've heard this before, and you may have tried meditating and concluded that it isn't your cup of tea. Try again. Sit down and get comfortable, pay attention only to your breathing. Let each breath take you down to a more relaxed state. Continue for at least twenty minutes for at least one session each day, preferably in the early morning. The effects will increase with time.

3. Act deliberately. Much of our daily activity is dictated largely by situations, other people, or external demands. To act deliberately is to operate from inner calm so deep, you may appear slow to react–and you are! You’re taking the time to respond in an appropriate manner. How do you begin to act deliberately? By monitoring your reactions on a moment-by-moment basis for three days in a row; you'll be happily surprised at the difference it makes.

4. Develop a sense of pace. Everything has its own rhythm. The pace each person seeks allows them to align with what’s going on while still to acting deliberately. It’s rewarding to follow your own sense of pace and enable your own methods of relaxation.

5. Eliminate and recharge. Eliminate clutter, noise, distractions, and people who drain your energy. When you eliminate, you purify. A master has been called one from whom all extraneous elements have been removed. Mastery is a form of purity. Withdraw and recharge whenever needed, to keep your calm and be fully present. Spiritual leaders have always practiced and advocated self-purification and renewal through withdrawal and solitude.

6. Commit to service. Organize your day not by how much you get, but by how much you give. Good things will come into your life more effortlessly. You don't have to find a great cause or become a professional do-gooder. Just engage fully in the opportunities that appear every day. When you do, you'll find that those opportunities become more frequent and you grow.

7. Stop chasing your mission. Have you discovered your mission in life? If not, are you filled with a consuming desire to know what you are all about? If so, stop worrying about that, and just become fully engaged in your present. Let your mission find you. It will come, I promise, most likely as a quiet nudge that something just feels right.

8. Let go of your attachments. Everything to which you are attached prevents you from moving freely. Letting go is an absolute requirement in this life and, ultimately, of this life. Adjust your thinking so that letting go becomes a joyous act rather than a personal sacrifice.

9. Love unconditionally. To love unconditionally means to love without any strings attached. It's the toughest kind of love because it’s often most needed in situations that can best be described as unjust or unfair. So why is it necessary to love unconditionally? Because unconditional love heals.

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